adult years

Super Bowl Inspiration.

 I’m not a football fan.
The only reason I watch the Super Bowl is for the snacks and the half time show.

This year’s half time show was amazing!
Two strong successful Latina women with insane moves and voices was awesome to see.
J.Lo’s and Shakira’s performance was dripping with culture and pride.
I found it very inspirational and fun.
It made me want to get to know my culture a bit more.

I’m Mexican, and both my parents are Mexican.
But growing up I wasn’t taught much about the Mexican culture.
If anything, I was taught to be embarrassed about being Mexican.
My Mom’s boyfriend (who was white and also my abuser) would call Mexican’s derogatory racists names.
Names I won’t even write here because they are so disrespectful.

At times he made me feel embarrassed and less than for being Mexican.
I’m sure my Mother felt it too.
Which is probably why Mother never really exposed me to the culture.
Even though she was born in Mexico and Spanish was her first language.
She would cook Mexican food sometimes and I would eat it, but that’s as cultural as we got.

Once I got away from my Mother and her boyfriend, I realized that being Mexican is nothing to be ashamed of.
I started taking Spanish lessons, listening to Mexican music and cooking Mexican recipes on a weekly basis.
Rob and I really love Mexican food!

But I want to learn more about my culture.
More than just listening to it and eating it.
I wanna know where I come from?
Who my ancestors are.
How to salsa dance.

I also want to learn how to speak Spanish properly.
Right now my pronunciation is super rough.
I need more practice.
My dream is to live in a Spanish speaking country for a year.
I would become a Spanish speaking salsa dancing queen so quick!
Maybe one day.
Until then I have Duolingo.

Rob and I will eventually have a kid, and when we do I want our child to grow up knowing their culture because they will be half Mexican.
But most of all, I want them to be proud of who they are and where they come from.
So I need to find out because I can’t teach them if I don’t know.
And, I just want to know for myself because I’m proud to be Mexican.

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